Confessions of a Recovering Perfectionist

I often write notes to myself. Not because I'm insane (Well...partially because of that) but mostly because writing things down helps me remember  and seeing words in all caps is like a silent yell from my inner self. And it's really hard to ignore my inner self.

I have a few around my desk, "It's only impossible until it's not." and "Complaining doesn't change anything. Action does." 

In February I added "Perfection is the enemy of done." 

And as much as that note yells at me, it’s been a tough lesson to live. 

Confession: I have a thing for Perfection. Or better yet, my personal idea of Perfection. I want things to be as buttoned up, as impactful, and as shiny as possible. If it's a representation of me, it has to be quality. Like Barney's level quality.

However, my problem is that I go miles past Kmart in to Nordstrom territory - which is a very, very good place to be -  but keep pushing, fighting, stressing and obsessing to get to Barney's. And I wear myself the eff out getting there or beat myself up for having not made it all the way. 

And those times I do get there, I’m not sure the store windows are clean enough, or the AC is at the right temp. What if someone thinks the revolving door is completely idiotic? (These are just metaphors of course. I’m talking about work – creating an ad or writing a headline and all that jazz, not building a department store.)

It's not that I'm scared of failing. (Read Mistakes Won't Kill You) And I totally believe in trying as many options as you can and doing multiple versions, and editing and re-editing. (Read Edit, then Edit Again) 

My issue is that I have a really hard time with things not being just right. Even if it’s at 98.9% right – I want that last 1.1%. So I often overthink, overedit, overanalyse, overwrite and pretty much drive myself mad.

Perfection is the enemy.

When you have an 8 a.m. deadline, Perfection will have you up all night, drinking unhealthy amounts of 5 Hour Energy and ignoring your body’s pleas for basic things like sleep and bathroom breaks.

When you need to present 3 versions of an ad, but the 2^nd one isn’t just right, Perfection will have you staring at a screen until your eyes twitch. Perfection will make you have 4 browser tabs open, all on Thesaurus.com, combing through lists and lists of ways to say the same damn thing, agonizing over every little detail. Perfection will leave you with one really great version, one good version and one red-headed-step-child version.

Perfection will make you look bad in front of your boss and coworkers.

Perfection will make you late for meetings.

Perfection will leave you with stupid, amateurish mistakes (like its/it's.)

Perfection will make you doubt yourself, your abilities and your entire purpose in life.

Perfection will wear you supermarket-plastic-bag thin.

Perfection will keep you from actually getting shit done.

 

I’m not at all saying just focus on just getting to the finish line, whether or not it’s any good. I’m saying if you’re aiming for exceptional and end up with great – be thankful for great and move on. It's better to have something complete to show than something half-baked but beautiful. (Or worse, a very shiny turd.)

There will be time to edit and re-edit. Trust me, your boss, project managers, account people and client will find always something wrong with what you did, no matter how perfect you thought it was.

You’ll have time to go back and make it better. To Barneyfy it. And you’ll come to realize that sometimes, Nordstrom’s is exactly what they wanted. Or that your Nordstrom’s is someone else’s Barney’s.

What you never want to do is mis-manage your time, miss deadlines, drop the ball on things, burn yourself out or sacrifice your health in chasing this ideal of Perfection.

Don’t be so hard on yourself.

No one expects you to be perfect. No one expects you to have Barney’s quality all the time. Or to never make a mistake. 

But  everyone expects you to deliver. To actually get shit done. And to do it well. (Whether at work or in school.)

If it's a good idea, that will show. Even if it's written on a napkin. It's better to finish it and have something to show, instead of spending hours polishing what turns out to be a very pretty Dollar General idea and realise you stressed yourself out for nothing. 

Focus on completing first, then get to finessing and polishing. Everyone is going to have feedback on what you do anyway. And you’re probably going to look back in a month and see how you can make it better. (Read Your Book WillNever Be Done.)

I’m going to take my own advice and finish this post. It’s a good post. And it doesn’t have to be perfect. (Read Be A Mess)

Wait. Let me just pull out my thesaurus and red pen and read it one more time.

No. I won't do it. I'm done.

Hi, my name is Neisha and I'm dangerously Virgo and an insatiable perfectionist. And I'm working on getting over myself.

Here's some notes you can write to yourself to help you get over yourself too.

Look At Me

You have a good portfolio -- now what? Well, now you have to figure out how to get people
to look at it. And then to want to call you in for an interview. And that's when you can hit them with the one two - great book, great personality POW - you're hired!

But how do you go from step 1 - to steps 2 and 3? 

The basic idea is of having a portfolio is to show people how you think. How smart and creative you are. How you can solve problems. And what you'll bring to table. 

So start thinking about how you can do that even before someone clicks on your link.

Here's a great example of a creative way to get noticed. 

Two students put their books in bathrooms at agencies around New York -   showing that they can come up with creative solutions - which is what you're going to do every day when you get hired. 

It's all about how you can get the right message, to the right target, at the right time. (Well in this case, right-ish.) 

The Toilet Book from Akos Papp on Vimeo.

Read this article about how and why they did it. Junior Ad Men Drop Off Portfolios In Bathrooms And Get Jobs

Mailbag: New to the Biz, What Now?

As if moving to New York weren't stressful enough, add starting a new job, oh, and in a new industry. *Gulp* Now that you've found somewhere to live, have figured out your morning commute and three or more people at work know your name -- what next?

I want to share this exchange* with all of the folks who just moved, are about to move or who are looking to do more and meet more people in advertising.

Q: I recently left working in the music industry to start in media and I would love to pick your brain about how to go about creating and cultivating the relationships.

A: Welcome to the biz! 

The biggest tip I can give you is to network and get involved. Well, those are two tips, but they are kind of intertwined.

Here's what works for me:

1. Networking online - 

* Beef up your LinkedIn profile and connections. Advertising is very much and who knows who business, so it helps to quickly and easily show your professional associations online. (Remember to only connect with people you know and send a note with your request if there's even a 30% chance they may not remember you.)

* Join LinkedIn groups. There are so many for advertising, media, NY media and just about anything you can think of. Join a group or two, follow the conversations, see what events are posted and go to those.

* Utilise your social networks. Personally, I try to keep Facebook for friends only, but that's up to you. Be sure to like agencies' pages so you can see what's going on with them. and who you follow on Twitter. Twitter is a quick, non-invasive and less threatening environment to start conversations with strangers and people you may not usually have access to.

Oh, and follow, like and add agency pages on Twitter, Facebook - this will help you find out about events and such.

2. Networking offline - 

* RSVP and get out there. When it comes to advertising people in NY, there is always some social event going on. There are agencies and ad organistations that often host presentations, panels, workshops, mixers, screenings and plain ole parties.

* Invite an industry friend or coworker. Don't invite your best friend because you two will spend more time talking to each other and not meeting new people. If you take someone who you have a looser connection with, you'll be able to get to know them better, meet people who they know, and have someone to talk to so you don't look like a loser in the corner.

* Challenge yourself to meet 3 new people every time you go out. Don't go on an introduction spree or business-card-collecting rampage. Focus on quality not quantity. Find a few people and get to know them better. Chances are you'll see them out at another event, and chances are, if they liked you from your initial conversation they'll introduce you to more people - and invite you to more events.

3. Get involved - 

* Volunteer. Find an event organiser or organisation leader tell them you're interested - something like "Hey, let me know if I can help with anything. The next event or whatever you need. I'd really like to get more involved with XYZ." I'm 99.55% sure they won't say "No thanks, we don't ever need help with anything. Get lost."

Check with your agency and see what internal and external things they're involved with and help out however you can.

* Become a member. Join an organisation or two and get on their email lists, etc. I promise you'll meet more people and become more invested in the industry on a whole.

* Ask people out. Let them know you'd love to keep in touch, email to feel out the post-event connection, then ask them out for coffee/drinks. If you're still not sure it's time for a one-on-one session, invite them to an event you're going to. (See the 2b above)

4. Be nice. 

This is pretty self-explanatory. Just don't be an asshole.



It's not a science or anything, do what works best for you, your personality and your lifestyle.
For outside of work stuff, Here is TimeOut's list of 50 ways to make friend in NY 

*I slightly edited the email to get to the meat of it. And to protect the innocent, of course. 

Why I'm Not A Lawyer

One of my fav poems starts out "All of the best writers are lawyers..."

And I know a lot of great writers who became lawyers. I have a lot of friends that are lawyers. And briefly considered it myself. (Thank sweet soon-to-be-born Jesus I chose advertising instead.)

Working in an ad agency and a law firm are similar in certain ways - crazy hours, lots of pressure and politics, lots of perks and networking, stress and fixing messes and infrequent but rewarding wins.

But I get to wear flip flops in the office. And my research consists of browsing YouTube, Facebook, Twitter and Ads of the World. And the best, best part about working in advertising is working in advertising. You've never heard someone say "Did you see that awesome contract Will drafted?"

Pretty much, the bottom line is that we get to do fun stuff like this:
(And even if you don't work on stuff like this directly, it's still awesome to know the option exists and to just be associated with this greatness.) 



and

 

and

 

and this too

 

 Take that corporate lawyers!
You may make more than I do, but I do more cool shit than you. Plus I'm happier.

Reality Check: I don't remember you.

However, I will smile and laugh with you and pretend like I do until I remember or someone else comes by and helps me out.

Nothing against you in particular, it just happens sometimes.

Yes, we met before. We probably chatted and we may have exchanged business cards and a joke or two, however, I don't remember your name, or anything about you to be honest.

And I'm just me. I don't meet that many people. But imagine a creative director or a recruiter. Imagine how many emails they must get in a day. How many business cards they hand out. How many short conversations they have between here and there. It adds up and it's hard to keep track of every face, name and story.

This is why you have to stand out (I wrote about this here) and you cannot be afraid to remind people who you are.

In emails: Refresh their memory on when and where you met, maybe even give a reference to what you talked about to recreate the context and then state your business.

You don't have to attach photos or anything, just keep it simple: "Hey, I'm Julie, we met at the Nerdfest last Tuesday, I was wearing hot pink glasses."

In person: Don't be afraid to reintroduce yourself. Having a convo with someone who doesn't remember you is a waste of your time. Going through who you are a second time will help reenforce the information and hopefully they'll remember this time.

Don't act annoyed that they don't remember or try to hard to job their memory. Just start anew and try to do a better job of standing out. 

On LinkedIn: Always include a note with your invitation to connect. Say who you are and where you know them from.

I HATE getting messages that someone indicated that we're colleagues or friends when I have no idea who they are. (Lies! All lies!) I used to decline automatically (stranger danger) but I've started writing back and asking who they are, hoping it'd prompt people to realise we're not on Twitter, this is the grown up league.

Don't take the forgetfulness personally. And maybe it'll work to your advantage - consider it a second chance to leave a great impression. 

Develop A Split Personality

We're not friends.

Not you and I. Not you and your boss. Not you and 90% of your coworkers.

I like you and all. Think you're adorable. But be sure to always keep in mind that we're professionals and there is a line (sometimes etched in concrete, sometimes, sand) you should not cross.

This includes not bringing your personal drama to work as I talked about in the Creative Commandments.

And not friending me on the Facebook or following me on my personal Twitter account or vice versa.

(This is a personal peeve of mine because I like to keep my business and personal separate, but some people don't mind. Just don't assume I want to see where you were on your last vacation or read your drunk tweets. And I definitely don't want you to see that one pic of me making out with a bag of kettle corn or to get a whiff of one of my potty-mouthed tweet rants.)

I need to see you as a capable professional. Someone I can look in the eye at work and view as reliable, mature and competent. I'd like you to look at me as the same.

At home, I may walk around barefoot and eat peas out of a can, but at work, I'm in heels, wielding a pencil. All that matters is the latter.

Allow people their privacy. Allow yourself your privacy.

You'd be surprised how quickly someone will turn on you and say "He tweeted he was out at 4 a.m. so he was probably late because he was hung over" when they want to steal your shine (#haters), or they're out drinking with coworkers and that third beer diluted their filter.

When it comes to CDs you want to work with, senior level people you currently work with and anyone you want to respect you in the morning, keep your profile professionally driven, limit what they can see, or reach out to them on LinkedIn – the official place to connect with professionals.

You're young so have fun. But you're also young and trying to establish yourself so you don't want anything to work against where you want to be in the future.

Yes, advertising is more fun and more lenient. Yes, people talk about taboo stuff all the time. Yes, your coworkers may overshare from time to time.

But you're new and no one has any allegiance to you. No one knows that you're an amazing writer/designer/art director. No one knows that you're super smart and super dedicated. You show yourself to be unreliable or undesirable in one area, they're going to generalize it to all.

 

Pow. There goes your credibility.

Split your personality. Have your work self and your home self. And nurture and love each one of them. (Hug them, love them, tell them they’re pretty.) But try to keep them apart. Kinda how you never saw Superman and Clark Kent in the same room.

It's simpler when things are separate.

p.s. when you ask someone to connect on LinkedIn and you've never met them, write them a note saying who you are, how you know them and why you want to connect. Post on that coming soon. Another peeve of mine but an important thing to do to help you stand out and make sure people click Accept Invitation.

Interview: Things Recruiters Love + Hate

Nothing beats hearing it from the horse's mouth.  Five recruiters and headhunters share some of the things you do in emails that they love and hate.

LOVE:

E-mails that clearly feature your title, level, current gig, link, referral (if applicable), and whether you're into freelance, full-time, or both, and your breadth of experience. – Kati

When you inject a dose of personality into your email. So I can get a feel for who you are as a person. – Cecilia

Tell me how you came across my name: did someone refer you to me, Linked In, Twitter, etc.?  - Laura

Always make sure to leave full contact information including all links to portfolios. – Kimberly

Simplicity of navigating sites – Lori

When they send me a follow up link with updated work 6 months to a year later. I may not have had a job then, but I might in the future. – Cecilia

HATE:

When you ramble. 6 paragraphs are 4 too many. – Cecelia

Unfinished portfolios: if you can't coordinate your own book, my agency will have a difficult time hiring you and I will have a hard time placing you.  – Laura

Long-winded explanations of each piece of work. – Lori

There is nothing worse than a glaring typo. Check everything (spec copy, name of the person you're emailing, company names, etc). Typos are a reflection of your own attention to detail.  – Kimberly

People who are lazy email communicators, who type 'r' instead of 'are,' 'ur' for you're & your.  Please email me like I am a colleague, not your drinking buddy.  – Laura

Overkill on the follow-up; recruiters can definitely use follow-up e-mails, but please give us a couple days to respond before trying again. – Kati

There you have it. Be nice, be concise, be buttoned up and be patient.

See more email tips The Art of Emailing and Email Dos & Don'ts

Happy emailing!

Special thanks to my wonderful and informative interviewees:

Cecilia Gormam: VP, Director of Creative Services, Y&R/Wunderman Irvine & Owner, Creative Career Management 
Kati Llewellyn: Associate Creative Recruiter, Draftfcb Chicago

Kimberly Easley: VP, Director of Creative Resources/Recruiting, Publicis Modem NY
Laura Bonetti: Creative Recruiter, Kay & Black NY

Lori Greenberg: Co owner/president, Greenberg Kirshenbaum NY

Email Dos & Donts

photo by: Aymane Remmal

Personally, I love email. Professionally, I've come to regard email the way most people view going to the DMV. You have to do it to get what you want but there's always too much involved for what should really be an easy thing... forms to fill out, lines, rules, etiquette, overcrowding, people with attitudes for no reason...

Sigh. But email isn't all bad. When used for good, not for evil, it's a great tool to advance your career.

It's a quick and easy way to interact with coworkers, connect with people you won't usually talk to and show your personality and skills.

It's also a quick and easy way to make yourself look like a fool.

(People have been fired over emails. Is that what you want to tell your mom the next time you call home? That an email did you in? That you were thwarted by Outlook? Don't be that guy.)


     Do                                                                                              

• add some personality (Be smart, witty and charming.)
• use adjectives and adverbs
• be clear and concise
• spell check and proofread. Then spell check again
• get to the point (People don't have all day.)
• end with next steps and/or questions
• keep it professional. (Save all of that banter for awkward elevator rides.)
• follow up if you don't hear back within a day or two. "Hey, just checking in about..." 

       Don't                                                                                    

• expect people to read between the lines and figure out what you mean
• use multiple or difficult to read typefaces or colors
• use emoticons, ALL CAPS or !!!! (Even one ! is too much. This is an office, not a monster truck rally)
• use slang, curses or unconventional spelling
• say anything flirty, sexist, racist, homophobic or political (even if they're doing it)
• email anything you don't want in writing
• send out invites to your band's show/charity walk/ birthday party/ thing no one cares about
• be sarcastic or flippant (they often come off the same in writing: rude)
• overuse the reply all button
• ignore emails. Always reply, even if it's a simple "Ok."

What's So Special About You?

In an earlier post, interviewee Qiana mentioned how in portfolio school she realised she’s no longer “The Creative One.” This is true for advertising as a whole.

This isn’t Kansas anymore.

In college or at home you may have been the most creative, interesting and artistic person, but here, you’re just another Dorothy. 

Get in line.

This industry is where all the creative souls, brave dreamers and cool weirdos flock to. So when you walk through the doors of an agency for an interview, you need to come with something better than “I’m creative.”

While we’re at it – Advertising has an abundance of people who are Funny, Quirky, Smart, Different, Artsy, Crafty, Witty, Eccentric, Colorful, Special, Hardworking, Sociable, Articulate, Dedicated, Talented, People Persons, Alternative Thinkers and Technology/Music/Art Geeks.

Which is great – now you’ll  be around like-minded people and feel accepted for who you are. But it also sucks because it’s harder to speak up and stand out when everyone’s voices, ideas and clothes are so loud.

So take a second, swallow your ego, humble yourself and then ask yourself this question:

what’s so special about me?

What makes me different?

Why should this agency hire me and not that other kid with a great book and a funky t-shirt? (Just a heads up, advertising is probably one of the only industries where even  if you make all your own clothes, you still might see someone dressed like you. I've seen my creative doppelganger once, and if we cross paths again, I'm going to kill her. There can only be one.) 

Find all the unique bits and pieces that make up who you are. The fact that you were born outside of the country. That you bind books by hand. That you were an economics major in undergrad but changed your mind the day after you started your first blog. That you speak four languages. That you were an eagle scout and had 23 badges. That your mother is Irish Catholic and your father is an East African Muslim. That you taught for America for two years. That you were head of the film club in school. That you can eat your weight in jelly beans. That you’re obsessed with extreme sports.

Whatever it is, as long as it’s you and it’s true – bring it to the table with your portfolio and personality as part of the overall package you have to offer.

Whether it’s experience that could come in handy on the job one day or just interesting things for water-cooler conversation and agency talent shows. As long as it makes someone remember you at the end of the day and pick you out from the crowd of strategically unkempt, big-glasses-wearing, ironically-tattooed, smarty-pants creative types begging to be hired.